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Worthy How to Gain Back Trust in a Relationship – After a Betrayal
We have already published about “saving you marriage after cheating or infidelity” but today we will discuss some effective tips to gain back trust in a relationship.
You may have heard that that broken trust is like a broken dish that can be mended but its cracks are always there. Similarly, it is very difficult to gain trust back in a relationship, once it’s gone. But not impossible. Trust is the most basic factor that makes any relationship stronger and without it your connection with your spouse is meaningless.
Meaning of Trust in a Relationship
Before getting to our main topic “tips to gain trust back”, we need to see the definition of trust in a relationship.
Trust is such a thing that cannot be gained forcefully but you can gain it with the passage of time. For most people, the definition of trust is that you should have the bank account details of your spouse. Or maybe you should have his/her all personal details like mobile phone and social media account passwords.
Typically that is not the definition of trust. In actual it means that you have some faith in your spouse that he/she is committed to you. Secondly, you are feeling comfortable and safer with your spouse.
Some of the Signs of Trust in any Relationship
- Both of you respect each other
- You are not possessive
- You are supporting each other in difficult times
- Both are enjoying your relationship with effective communication
- You are listening to understand each other
- You do not feel it right to hide anything from your spouse
- You know the boundaries of your relationship and also feel safer with each other
Simple Steps to Rebuild and Regain the Trust in a Relationship
Sometimes we hurt your spouse or relations intentionally or unintentionally. Whatever the reason is, its results are very harsh. Maybe you are the one who did this and now you are trying to save yourself. The following points are very worthy to try if you are serious about getting back the trust of your spouse.
1- Accept Your Mistake that you have Broken the Trust
Even before apologizing, always accept your mistake. In this case, you have betrayed your partner, you should accept that I have committed a big mistake and feeling guilty. The problem relationship starts when a person is not willing to accept his/her mistakes.
People who have strong-willed always accept their mistakes. In fact, it is among the characteristics of successful people who identify and accept their mistakes. To convince your partner, just start with this basic step.
2- Make an Effective Apology Plan to Re-establish Trust
For every critical situation, there is always a plan. Obviously, when you have broken someone’s trust, you also need an apology from him/her. In case of the trust issues, your case might be considered as critical and severe.
Before seeking forgiveness from your partner just forgive yourself first. For you having regret is more than enough. Make your mind that forgiveness is the main key if you want to repair your relationship.
Let me get very straight forward to you. The chances of forgiveness in the betrayal cases are very low in the first attempt. I mean to say that you may have to keep on trying after some intervals of time.
For that purpose, I would recommend you to have a minimum of 2 plans. You can name them as Plan A and Plan B. Suppose that if plan A is failed you can move towards plan B.
3- Talk in a Good Time Only
For everything, there is a right time. Just choose the right time to have a discussion, when he/she is not very angry at you. Give your partner some time and space and then wait for the right time.
4- Give your partner some time to think
Even if you have admitted your mistake and ready to apologize, your partner may be not ready to accept the things. Cases of infidelity and betrayal are considered as complex and your partner may need ample time to get out of the things.
5- Don’t Pressurize your Partner
Many a time I have seen that people pressurize their partner for the forgiveness. I need you to remember that there is no space of pressure in an ideal relationship.
6- Keep Yourself Clear from Any Mysterious Activity
This is a general rule of our society that one a person commits a mistake; people accuse that person again and again because the trust is not there anymore. So, avoid any inconvenience, juts keep yourself away from any mysterious or illegal activity. Keep yourself clear and share everything with your partner.
7- Be Humble and Have Some Patience
Rebuilding or reestablish trust in a relationship can take much more time. Even more than your expectations. So, the key is to bear the things with patience in this hard time. You may feel yourself self-loathing or guilty. Instead of disappointment just consider it a golden chance to make your relationship even stronger than before.
Yes! You are not alone
Many times relationships have to have some hardships and that is not an astonishing thing. There is no harm or shame in seeking the help of a professional.
Couples counseling is a good option for the people who are having the trust issue, especially the people who have been betrayed or suffered from infidelity.
Usually, the counselors are unbiased people that can guide you in a proper manner. It’s a better approach to hire a couple of counselors instead of having a rude conversation about betrayal on your own. A professional person can sort out your issues in a smooth way.
How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship – Final Words
Even after a breach of trust, you can re-establish a relationship. Only for that purpose, we have shared some fine tips to regain trust in a relationship. There are high chances that earn trust back in a relationship by following this advice. We also recommend that never hesitate to hire a relation advisor if you consider your case to be of a critical level.
Amanda Love is a marriage consultant and a relation advisor. She is a lawyer by profession that mainly deals in the issues related to marriage, divorce and physical abuse.